No One

I lost my voice
This wasn't a choice
I'm in vain
Can you feel the pain?
My thoughts echoe
Feelings grow
Tripping on acid
I've fallin' and slid
Break this chain
& whipe away the stain
Digging my own grave
Like some kind of slave
I can't take this anymore
I'm torn to the very core

It's whatever

I wish I could just keep everything to myself
Things seem better that way
I don't even care if I have all of these thoughts bottled up inside of me anymore
There's no point in letting people know how I feel when all it got me is to this point in my life
Nothings the same and it's never going to be
Do I have to keep lying to myself, or continue to lie to you so that I can be happy?
Why do I feel like this is all a game & I'm the dice you throw to decide where your fate rests?
It's whatever
I can keep doing what I want behind your back & never be truly happy
or you can let me find a decent person & let me be happy
In the end, I'm not ruining your life, your ruining mine
& nothing I can say or do will ever be good for you
You really don't understand and you never will
There isn't a trace of empathy until you decide you want it
I don't want to become some loner, but if you crave for that sense of acceptance from everyone else in your life, then I will never understand where your coming from myself
I just want to run far away & never come back
Just to have a fresh start
I don't even care anymore
It's whatever

Friends?

We grew up together

Always laughing, having many great times

So many memories to look back on

I wonder why our friendship made that turn

I wonder why, as soon as I do something you don't like, I feel like you treat my like an outsider

Even when no one else took me in, you did

You made me feel like I had a friend, but now, I don't know what to think

Friends forever, Friends till the end..

If that was true, then why'd you give up on me so easily?
Why do you look at me with those eyes, trying to make me feel the way you do, when I feel like you could never ever feel the way that I do?

We aren't the same person, and we never will be, but that's the thing.. Opposites attract, even in friendships.

Quit trying to make me into something i'm not. People grow up, and change.

I'm not that little innocent runt I once was.

If you want to still be friends, I am always here. 

But it's hard to be friends with someone who doesn't accept me for who I am, and is happy for me.

I don't get what's going through your mind, and you probably feel the same way, but Friendships are supposed to last.

A kid attempts to throw a rock and have it skip across the water.

He keeps on trying and trying, but as he does it more and more, he eventually learns the best technique to get that rock to skip. He keeps in mind the shape of the rock, and the way that he holds it and throws it. He made it happen because he didn't give up. Friendships are challenging, but they are worth it! If you're a true friend, you will always be there when your friend needs you, and never give up on them for anything. To be a true friend may take time, but the effort you put into it will make all the difference in the end. 

People judge others so easily, and just give up on them when they do something they don't like. Who gives a crap? Don't be so quick to judge.. 

When you just ignore a friend because they are living a certain lifestyle that doesn't settle good in your stomach, then your probably making that person feel like you don't care about them at all.. Don't ignore your friends and make them feel like crap, because you may be one of the only true friends they ever had, and now they may feel like no one is there for them.

Do you really care?

How come I feel like you don't even know me..?

I opened up to you, yet you "act" as though I never said anything at all..

It may have been a lot to take in, but I thought you were supposed to be there for me through this.. Aren't you supposed to be the one to make these wrongs right?

Are you completely blind to see what's right in front of you? 

What's taking form right before your eyes? 

If you didn't want this to happen, then maybe, just maybe you would have been the support I needed at the time.

Don't underestimate your authority. You could make a change if you really wanted to, but your just sitting back.. The things you've betrayed and had hatred for so long, are slowly morphing into your reality.

What Have I Become? This egotistic, eccentric person who only cares about his own selfish needs? Did this have to happen? Is this who I really am, or just something temporary?

God I can't go on in my own understanding.. So please, just this once, help a guy out?

I need to understand what to do and who to become for my future, yet nothings working out.. or is it?

People are so misunderstood, and lost, yet no one is there to help..

Do you really want to just sit back and let your friends drowned in a continuous flood?
If your answer is no, then talk to them.. They NEED your help and guidance..

Good day.

Run like the wind bullseye!

I've had a hard time struggling with who I am exactly as a person.
All of this talk about what my friends and family have planned for their futures.
 It seems like I don't have anything planned out for my future, but I've realized I'm going to be okay.
God put me in this position I am in for a reason.
It's time for me to have passion in my strengths and to not worry about my weaknesses.
God has my heart and no one else needs it.
He will restore and mend my heart in the best way possible.

Although I am not perfect, I should strive to do my best and to be more like Christ.

Ever think that there's more to life then just living for yourself?
I feel like that quite a bit myself.
Finding out who you are is essential at a young age, like myself of 19.
I need to evaluate my life and figure out what needs to be changed.

Don't let your struggles define who you are, but overcome them with Faith.
You may struggle with stealing, but your actions define you rather than your struggle.
Your only a thief if you keep giving in and accepting it as a part of you.
It's super hard not giving in to your selfish desires, so you have to make it a top priority in your life to overcome it.

I'm no trying to sound religious or anything, but there is an enemy named Satan and he will do his best to destroy you.
He's not that strong though, because with God on your side, you will overcome any obstacle that you've been hit with.

Don't run away from your problems because all that will do is make things worse.
Hit them head on and reach for the sky!

Until next time!

,Jonathon

My poems

Just wanted to write down some poems in this blog entry today!
Not sure what i'm going to do with them yet. Probably do some more editing to them.. eventually..
Hope u like them though. Let me know what you think of them! Thanks!


Jesus Christ I love you,
I can't believe what you've been through
Each and every day,
It's never the same
You are perfection,
 beyond my recognition
Oh so mighty is your word,
cutting deeper than any sword
Giving up my selfish life,
I turn to you in strife
My anger releases,
you put together my missing pieces.

&

This constant agitation,
My body, slowly wasting
Your sympathy doesn't matter,
Like broken glass, I shatter
Realizing my pain,
It's utterly insane
Flowing like a river,
I endeavor
Life is a test,
not put at rest
But that's okay,
I shall delay..

AND I will probably add more later. Keep it fresh! :)
,Jonathon

Wondering & Dreaming

"I wonder what my life would be like if I was rich?"
"I wonder who I would be if I lived my life to the fullest?"

Is it so bad to wonder I ask?


I mean we can all have dreams, even one's we know most likely won't ever come true.
Just follow those dreams in which are obtainable and don't rely on the one's that aren't!


Hmmm.. Can life be this simple? Are we not supposed to make our dreams a reality?


Pray and ask God for guidance on this factor in life.
I'm sure we all love to dream and wonder, but not all of that is in God's place for us.


When I speak of dreams at this moment, I mean more of what you have in mind for your future. Like goals you have set for yourself.
Dreams you have while you sleep may have to do with these goals, but most dreams are pretty weird..


So how do we know if the dreams/goals we have for ourselves are in line with what Jesus Christ has for us?
Well pray and ask him. It's that simple. Be patient and wait for an answer.


Proverbs 3:6 In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.

Pretty straightforward. Just seek him and have faith. He will give you the answers your looking for.

Philippians 4:6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.

Amen! (=

Zephaniah 2:3 Seek the LORD, all who are humble, and follow his commands. Seek to do what is right and to live humbly.


By doing what is right, God will help you and reward you. 

Okay so I know not everyone believes in Jesus Christ as their Lord and Savior.

"So why should I even believe what you have to say?"

I would tell you to pray about it, but if you don't believe in God in the first place, then just trust me. I am your friend if you found this link on my facebook page.. lol

The point I was trying to come across on this journal is; Many people just jump into so many circumstances and situations that seem "well" to them. I know I don't want to live for myself anymore though, and I care about others. I think no matter what you believe in, we should all seek to help others. :) Caring for others really  helps you become happy in the end anyway!

I know when I help someone out, I feel so much better about myself.

Okay so look at your life right now and think of ten hobbies you have.

If these hobbies have to do with Skateboarding, Swimming, Playing Guitar, Videogames, T.V., Movies, hanging out with friends, and other things you like to do that don't necessarily help anyone else out other than yourself, then maybe you need to re-invent your hobbies.

(Sorry terrible run-on sentence, I know... =P)

I don't know what you think you should do, but seek to do selfless acts of kindness each and everyday. Think of helping someone else out each day, and do what you can do to put a smile on someone's face!

Peace!